Sober living while married — has anyone done it? Is it giving up on the marriage?

It feels like rejection and it's usually the opposite — it's scaffolding. Coming straight home hands a newly sober person the full weight of marriage, kids, and old routines on day one, in the exact rooms where the drinking lived. A few structured months nearby — with visits, dates, and family counseling on a schedule — lets the recovery get load-bearing before the full weight goes back on. The marriages I've watched survive this were the ones that treated sober living as 'we're renovating the foundation,' not 'he moved out.' Ask the counselor to put a timeline and a couples-work plan around it so it has a shape and an end.